I totally missed out on posting about the Girl Talk book club last week because the book was lost for a bit (argh). Easy to do with all that is happening around here. Go check out what Girl Talk had to say on Chapter 4.
Go HERE to read my previous articles that cover chapters 1-3 as well as the foreword and preface (which I really had no clue how vital a read the preface and foreword were until Girl Talk pointed out why... and might I add that I gleaned MUCH from this often skipped section). Please note that the link to my previous articles may not, at some point, contain every article because it only displays a set amount. If that becomes the case you can do a site search which is located above the ClustrMap. Just type in Girl Talk book club.
This weeks assignment was Chapter 5 and titled 'God Never Makes Mistakes' (1846-52)
This chapter particularly stands out to me as rich. It begins with the joys and woes of Elizabeth Prentiss' experiences as a first-time mother a year and a half after her marriage. I also became pregnant fairly soon after my husband and I got married. I was actually mortified at the thought of being a mother for a couple of reasons. (1) My mother left when I was 6 years old and I did not want to follow in her footsteps (2) I was the baby in my family and had little experience with babies.
Elizabeth shares in her journal that she would stay up awake at night and watch and marvel at her child and claim motherhood to be "as natural as life"... but then she writes "I find the care of her very wearing and have cried ever so many times from fatigue and anxiety..." Yet she claims that her child pays her for all she does.
Boy... do I ever understand those words. One moment my first baby would be screaming... endlessly screaming (he was colicy) and perhaps he would then suddenly smile or coo or giggle. Aaahh... a gift to me from heaven... a "payment" from my son. Those were often the moments that would help me persevere through the endless screaming and sleepless nights. And my dear husband, in the midst of his hectic schedule, would often stay up and help me care for our child... walking him back and forth as he listened to a "Come to the Cradle" CD over and over and over. That is a CD we tend to buy as a gift to first-time parents.
"Teach us to number our days aright, that we may gain a heart of wisdom." Ps. 90:12 There were a lot of
deaths in this chapter. The first one was of Elizabeth's sister-in-law. A woman that was dearly loved by her. Her death was fairly soon after the birth of George and Elizabeth's first child. Elizabeth was still recovering from the birth and was unable to travel. But George did see her and wrote home to tell her about it. This dear woman on her death bed was
feeble but
smiling sweetly with
child-like expressions and feelings... It was delightful for George to witness this and to see His mother
wonderfully calm and happy as the house seemed like the very gate of heaven...
The following is a nugget shared in Elizabeth's journal that keeps coming to mind: George had to leave for an extended visit to Maine to preach as well as to see family and Elizabeth sorely missed him. She found herself unable to shake off the thought of her husband not reaching his destination safely... to the point of rendering her useless.
She wrote, "...it frightened me to find how much I am under the power of mere feeling and fancy... Sometimes I say to myself, 'What madness to love any human being so intensely! What would become of you if he were snatched from you?' and then I think... He can give us strength for the endurance of His most terrible chastisements when the hour comes."
As a wife and mother I can attest to such times slipping into my thoughts and utterly
gripping me with fear. But then God, in His tender mercy and abounding love, causes me to find comfort in His Word through these futile, self-focused moments. His precious Word so clearly testifies of His enduring faithfulness and upholding strength... His perfect timing and wisdom. He truly IS my Comforter and Counselor.
Elizabeth also struggled, as every honest mother does, with the exhaustion that motherhood can bring. Especially when their children are new babes that demand so much time and energy... that season of life where we seem to struggle with finding the time to spend in God's Word as we lament over the poverty of our spiritual state and miss those much-needed rich devotional hours. A mother with young babies or small children also experiences a huge 360 overhaul in how and when she can pray, as prayers often mutate into tearful and weary pleadings for strength and endurance in spite of the sleepless nights and busy days. Elizabeth's husband tried to encourage her that the early years (before children) had been for contemplation: this season of life was for action. In other words, a time for mostly putting feet to what we proclaim to believe.
Throughout her life Elizabeth felt a desolation of spirit if she could not enjoy communion with God. Space and time for reflection and prayer was necessary she believed if she was to have closeness with her Lord.
Before coming home from a time of recovery, Elizabeth's son Eddy became very ill. She realized that he was seriously unwell, and at this point she gave him over to God. When he rallied and regained strength she felt as if another child had been restored to her-- not her own child., but God's.
Sometimes I find that I lose sight of the fact that all of my children are truly not mine to keep. Yes, they are in my husband and my care to grow them up in the fear and admonition of the Lord... but they are God's, to be used for His glory.
Elizabeth also fretted about the family finances as her ill health meant that more was being spent on 'help' than they could afford. However, even in these depressing circumstances she did not lose sight of God's plan for her life. This reminds me of our dear friends from our church. Their family is enduring a very heavy trial right now and have been a testimony of not losing sight of God's plan while in the midst of it.
Elizabeth confessed to her husband, "...I can never recover my spirits and be as I have been in my best days, but what I lose in one way perhaps I shall gain in another. Just think how my ambition has been crushed at every point by my ill-health, and even the ambition to be useful and a comfort to those about me is trampled underfoot, to teach me what I could not have learned in any other school."
Boy do I ever understand that.
Elizabeth's son Eddy had grown weaker and weaker. When he said 'I don't want to die', his mother replied, 'Why? You know it is a great deal pleasanter in heaven than it is here. At this point in the book I wept. I had to put it down for a bit for as I read those words and thought of my own children and my greatest fear as a mother... that my children would die before me. As I read on, the testimony of the tender mercy and enduring strength of God was so evident as Elizabeth, upon the death of her son, was able to say, 'It is well with the child.' And at the funeral was sung 'Thy Will Be Done' in which Elizabeth said that such a song was 'like cold water to thirsty souls.' She was submissive, writing the well-known words in her journal:' "Oh", said the gardener, as he passed down the garden-walk, "who plucked that flower?" His fellow-servants answered, "The Master!" And the gardener held his peace.'
She later said 'I use to think I could never endure to lose a child, but you see how it is. God does carry us through whatever He pleases.'
Three months after Eddy's death Elizabeth gave birth to a baby girl (Bessie).... For a couple of weeks after the birth, Elizabeth hung between life and death. When Bessie was a month old, Elizabeth was able to hold her close for the first time. Bessie was ill also and Elizabeth sensed an overpowering premonition that Bessie would soon die. At one point, Elizabeth begged that the baby be brought to her; the nurse said she was too sick to be moved, and in desperation Elizabeth crawled on her hands and knees to the nursery.
Upon the death of yet another child, Elizabeth could only repeat over and over to herself something that one of her friends had said when calling on that last dreadful day. 'God never makes mistakes.' Somehow she clung on to that truth.
I know I have shared what seems like a lot of this chapter with you all, but there is so much more to it. I pray that if you have not gotten this book yet, that you consider making it a must-buy. It is a keeper. In the foreword of this book, I recall that Barbara Hughes wrote: If you would rather avoid a painfully sanctifying comparison of your own faith with that of this woman, perhaps you should stop reading now. But please read on!
I am so thankful that I have read on.
Now go make sure, if you haven't already, that you read Girl Talk's post on this chapter where Nicole writes, Have you experienced tragedy in your life? The same God to whom Elizabeth clung remains faithful to this day. He has never made a mistake. And He never will.
Above is a pic of my youngest daughter and me.
My Husband, My brother in Christ
